Today

Plentiful; and plenty

Sigh.

And this is probably the most recently used reaction I gave to my friends when they asked me to go out during weekends - the saddest line I ever said, all fully slotted with other tasks in my schedule. Everyone around me and my family is getting married. Of course, I should be happy for the newly-wed couple and throw them all the best wishes quotes I have learnt in Chinese and English, they have my fair share of bliss and blessings, yet I hardly utter any smile since then I started working on the projects. I swear to God and oh my tien, the amount of work and responsibility dedicated for this semester is so overwhelming to the extent, I'm losing PLENTY of sleep, I'm binging on PLENTY of food, I skip PLENTY of my workout regime, I'm missing out in PLENTY of gathering this couple of weeks and the list goes on; I'm just gonna rant my liver out. The doctor prescribed a heavier dosage for my gastritis due to the excessive stress hormones this semester, I couldn't even think of any other ways to channel out my anger and rage, it's engulfing me inside - painstakingly bitter tasting my own fear.

As far as things are proceeding all well at their own pace, this slowly traces the path towards the self; the younger Shu Ting - two years ago, stepping fresh into this enormous circle of new faces and cliques of people that we deemed friends back then and probably still friends or better known as acquaintances. Though I've always said, "Haiyoyo, I don't really care. Really, not an issue if you're not talking to me, and I don't actually give a damn," but I actually give these people some flying fucks when I still hear from them - so I still do care about them afterall. (I blame my female's hormones)

I just can't, anymore.