For Ashwin and Alex.

It's like 5 minutes before the clock strikes twelve again. Usually, I'll be either snoozing soundly in my crib, one year ago, I was partying my life away, contaminating my lungs and my liver were pretty intoxicated during that stage in life, and for now, I'm so contented in life, staying in my sick bed reading just a good book and having a plenty of rest that my body well-deserved at this time of the week. I went shower, and it reminds me so much of the memory lane that tapped my back this evening watching a few series on the tv when I fell on-and-off asleep on my couch.


I have been taking so many medicine lately, countless times I actually made a few trips to different doctors in just a week. Knowing that lately many of my friends turned 21, and my presence there would probably make a slight difference - I felt so bad, SO SO BAD inside me, like really bad, I couldn't utter how depressed that I can't be there to sing you guys a birthday song, but I really wish you both a memorable 21st. Please claim your birthday lunch/dinner with me soon.


HAPPY 21st-BIRTHDAY, BOTH A'S (ASHWIN AND ALEX)

Alex . Ashwin . Nicole
(Grabbed something from Facebook  \(0_0)/ )

Happy birthday, Ashwin Asokan! You've always been a wonderful and great guy friend to me, each and everytime. I know what got us closer and who brought us together at the beginning. I'm so thankful and can't ask for more, we are still close buddies even after things changed, and that eventually strengthen our friendship; such irony!


Happy birthday, Alex Kwok! I'm so sorry that I gave you the thought that I clicked 'attending' to your 21ST YOLO HOTEL PARTY when cx mentioned to me about your birthday celebration. It's like a must every year to attend Alex's birthday dinner together and this year, regretfully for not being able to attend and at such last minute notice. You know you have been a really nice friend to me, all these while which words can't even describe more of what we both feel.


That's practically how bad I really felt inside staying in bed, but I'll be drafting a thought of mind that I'm going to write about, yayyers. I can't wait and I should catch some sleep again, time for my meds.


Birthday boys, and guys, please stay safe and have a blessed birthday! Loves

Long

So, I had the longest Friday ever yesterday with my lectures in school, lessons in class, and hours at work. And nothing gets better today. LIKE NOTHING AT ALL.

I just don't even know how to feel right anymore when it seems that everything isn't right at its pace. Possibly, it's just time of the month when my hormones are raging or could it be the haunt of the past? It's been 2 years down the memory lane, they should know it better that they do not have to tap me at the back of my mind. Everything is clearly refreshing in their auto-mode without any pause/stop/skip button.

The rain is adding on to the bloody-fckin' depressing mood. And my twitter account is still suspended. Bloody fuck, I don't even know what the fuck they want - back up code, temporary password. Just bloody return me my Twitter account that hard meh.

Bye larh bye.

Angry Shu Ting on Angry Monday

I'm so pissed.

Literally all anger and rage are fuming in this tiny bottle of soul in such rapid momentum I can't decide to hold them in anymore. It's been liddis for the past one week, and I can't figure single shiets behind all these hormonal tantrums I had bottled down, perhaps it's been there for months since I finished my internship and not wanting to be involved in any major roles in life because taking a break in life sounds like the perfect plan for now, at this age which I think I'm really getting older.

Physically, mentally and emotionally. I was so despair and upset over the tiniest thing ever, when my bestf doesn't reply my text even if her last seen in Whatsapp was after reading the text message I'd sent earlier. *stares

OR...

when I called her house, her cellphone, her everything that I can contact/dial/call/reach/sms/text/viber/ and etc but she still doesn't reply because she's missing in action. (Seriously, I regretted so much that I hate ACCA for lending my friend for 2 bloody years, or more likely - they just took her away without MY permission, yes MY PERMISSION)

See, you understand now when I said my hormonal tantrums lists can start anywhere from A to Z, then back to F and heads straight off to U and probably back to C, and next K. You got it right, pretty much fucked up when I am whiny, I rant and all these annoyance just piled up made Shu Ting such a grumpy child. Then over all these nonsense, I actually find the need to write all my anger down but as I typed longer, I lost my train of thoughts and I don't know where did all my previous angsty went! Either the rage had just flirt and dance with the wind or probably went down my large intestine. Shouldn't have had too much of the mata kucing when I was a little hesitated to binge on my dinner today, so I had a whole basket of the fruit while watching TV during my weekends. Smartypant resulted having bad diarrhoea, releasing all the shiets that I have amounted over months of constipated emotions. Seriously, constipation larh.

Maybe, I should start to think and imagine how's first class tomorrow for Fundamentals of Publishing gonna be like with Roshan's lessons. Hopefully, he's gonna be as kind as the previous semester he had with us, please...please don't make me regret switching my elective and taking his subject! September doesn't sound any nicer and kind anymore with the amount of assignments and project briefings we received during the first week of college. May the force be with us, for real.

Byebye.